The Post in Which I Restore My Honor by Offering Glenn Beck an Apology

Wayne's World 2, in my opinon, is one of the most awesome movies ever made, in spite of the fact that it was written in a mere 90 minutes.

For those of you who have never seen it (or have forgotten it), the plot is basically that local cable TV show host Wayne Cambell is visited in his dreams by Jim Morrison and a naked Native American dude to host a giant concert. On mere faith, Wayne sets out with his cohort Garth to make Waynestock the most awesome event ever. Hilarity ensues and a couple of alternate endings later Aerosmith shows up! Hooray! The concert is a success.

Now, today was Glenn Beck's much awaited "Beckstock", aka "The Restoring Honor Rally". I seriously doubt, however, that Glenn was taking his marching orders from Jim Morrison and a half naked Native American. Nope, I reckon we need look no further than the big JC himself.

Was I watching today? No. There were more important things to do this morning (go for a bicycle ride, watch Arsenal beat Blackburn 2-1, play with my daughter, do some homework, etc...). But, I did see some of Glenn Beck's closing remarks and I watched his opening remarks as well as Sarah Palin's speech in the middle of the rally. I think I have seen enough to make a post.

And yeah, I owe Glenn an apology (notice now that we are on a first name basis!). I may have said he was going to float across of a bunch of silly ideas and I may have also compared him to Benito Mussolini, though I never said he was LIKE old Mr. M, I just said in that one picture he sort of LOOKED like him. That's all.

After this rally though, I think Glenn looks more like Jerry Fallwell than anybody else.

But first, the apology. Let's get that out of the way: Glenn, I am sorry. You are not Benito Mussolini. And the stuff you talked about today was not silly. Honoring our military and others who have given so much to this country is a very important and good thing to do. And on the surface of things, I agree with a lot of what you say. It would be great if we all turned to God and enjoyed the personal relationship with Him that you seem privileged enough to have. It would be awesome if we all found a guiding moral compass, patched up our wrecked institutions, decided a person's character is the most important thing, put on our tri-corner hats and made America great again.

During the entire event Glenn never exploded into a politcally fueled rage, he didn't so much as mention the president (the pastor who said the closing prayer actually prayed for him), and he even kept Sarah Palin reigned in, who's speech mostly focused on three war stories that showcase American Honor and on the fact she herself is the mother of a comabt veteran.

In this way, Glenn has heaped coals on all of his enemies heads. And while I don't consider myself an enemy of Glenn Beck, I am definetely feeling the heat.

Apologies done, I will say that there is still tons to quibble with, setting aside even the differences in theology. But I got two main gripes:

On the idea that this nation was founded as a Christian Nation I am still a hard sell. I think there is plenty of room for debate there. I would agree that many of our founders were Christians and I would also agree that culturally we were definetly Christian for a long time. But it can also be said that many of the founders were nominal Christians, deists, and something very close to atheists - Washington, Franklin, and Jefferson the most notable. Oddly enough, these are the three founders whom Beck has had painted (or did he do the work himself?) and can be seen on his show, emblazoned with the values of "Faith", "Hope", and "Charity".

You can also make the argument by looking at the documents that founded our nation. It's been a while since I read it (and I probably shoud do so again), but I am pretty sure our constitution doesn't mention God once, not even with a cop-out like "Creator", which is a reference to God but not necessarily a Christian. I would argue that in our founding Enlightment ideals were equally important to Christian ones, if not more so.

There are lots of people who would disagree with me on that, but that is where my reading of history takes me.

And sure, it's hypothetically true that maybe if we had been founded 20 years earlier, and certainly 20 years later, the founders would have likely gone ahead and made us a Christian Nation, providing the freedom to worship in whatever denomination you wanted. But for some reason (could it be divine providence?) we were founded when Enlightenment ideals were at their height, deism was in vougue, and religion was being challeneged by Enlightenment figures everywhere...cheif among them Thomas Paine, a guy Beck also likes to hang his hat on. But I don't like the argument of "Oh, if we had been founded here, then...", becuase as Ted Morgan notes in Valley of Death, playing the what-if game only serves to make history more palatable.

Yes, I am one of those terrible people who think we shouldn't be led in prayer in public schools or before or after football games and you shouldn't put up your nativity scenes or minorahs in the public square. You want to jot off a quick prayer to God before a test, asking that you don't screw up, and that later maybe that cute girl who sits two seats ahead of you will actually talk to you today? Go for it. You want to get together with members of the other team after a game and pray to God on the field under your own leadership? Fine by me. You want to put up your nativity scene on church property next to a road where people can see it? Cool. But the moment it is led by a public figure or actually goes completely in a public space, I vote no. And that is the way the law is read today by the courts today. You want to chanage it? I suggest you try to amend the constitution. I will campaign hard to try to defeat it.

So anyway, if Glenn Beck wants to take us down that road, I am not with him. A personal religious renaissance is one thing; making the actual State a Christian one, or even a theistic one, is out for me. The state must remain neutral in all qusetions of religion as much as possible.

Second thing: it will be interesting to see if this changes his show any. Beck says we need to get back to a place where character is the most important thing. If that is the case, he shouldn't demonize people with decent character who have arrived at a different point of view. There are plenty of liberals or progressives out there who are people of merit and character. He should stop calling them the Cancer of Our Society.

He should also stop professing hatred for certain political figures, such as Theodore Roosevelt or Woodrow Wilson. Roosevelt, at the least, was a man of impeccable personal character and integrity. You can disagree with them all you want to, but stop saying you actually hate them. Hate, Mr. Beck, is not a Christian virtue, even the hatred of the dead.

Well, lets leave Glenn Beck in his post-rally state, which I am sure is one of satiated contentment. If he has any respect for our capitol or the monument beneath which he held his rally, he will pick up a trash bag and one of those trash picker upper sticks and get to work picking up all the refuse that his disciples have left behind. They may believe in Beck's 12 values, which do have some similarty with the Boy Scout law. But unlike the Boy Scouts, I doubt everyone at the rally subscribes to "Leave No Trace" principles and did a sweep of their area to make sure they left the Mall looking as beautiful as they found it. Glenn better hurry: there is a naked Native American dude on the way, and if he sees the mess everyone left behind he is going to start crying.