A Villanelle for David Moyes

A Villanelle for David Moyes

Manchester United have fallen from grace,

While Sir Alex Ferguson lectures in Boston.

And David Moyes cannot save face

After losing, emphatically, the title race

The cry goes up from Lanzhou to London

That Manchester United have fallen from grace!

And the Glazers, who so often victory chase,

Are disappointed with results, quite less than awesome,

Thus David Moyes cannot save face.

So Man U supporters, drink your beer by the case!

And Sell the “Chosen One” banner off at an auction!

For Manchester United have fallen from grace!

But do not the statue of the great one deface,

You, who did not heed his wise words of caution,

Which is why David Moyes cannot save face.

You gluttons of victory must feel the disgrace

And the pains that other fans feel oh so often.

At last Man United has fallen from grace,

And David Moyes cannot save face!

"First of all", you might be asking, "What is a Villanelle?"

Simply put, a villanelle is a poem of 19 lines of six stanzas (five with three lines, one with four) that have an aba rhyming scheme (abaa for the last one).  The tricky thing about it is that the first and third lines of the first stanza are repeated throughout the poem, though some variation is allowed. When I read about the form in The Making of A Poem by Strand and Boland, I never thought I'd be able to write one.

"Okay then," you say.  "Who is David Moyes?"

David Moyes, as of April 21, 2014, was the manager of Manchester United.  As of April 22, 2014, he is not.  He looks old for his 51 years, and he has been cursed with large eyeballs that sort of pop out of his head when he gets angry.  

Sadly for him, he's been angry a lot this season:  Manchester United sit 7th in the table at the tail end of their worst season in the Premier League era with 11 losses in the league -- more than they had in the last two seasons in Sir Alex Ferguson's reign combined.  

Anyways, today at work I had the honor of breaking the news to my boss after I saw it on CNN, who is a Manchester United fan.  I can't say that he didn't see it coming, but he was stunned that Man U would sack the manager with only three games left in the season; you would expect them to at least have the class to let the man finish it out....Unless they think that firing the manager will inspire the team to pick up points in a desperate attempt to reach the Europa League.  It is an odd thing, but sometimes in football firing a manager can give the team a quick lift and improve their form for at least a few matches...sometimes more if a capable interim manager is named.

Slowly a villanelle on poor old David Moyes took form.  I started it before carrying out an audit on the CVN 78 and finished it during lunch.  I know it's lousy -- I had to do strange things with my language to make it fit the form and at the end of the day I didn't really follow the rules as strictly as I should, such that the Secret Poet's Committee of Standards and Forms would probably deny it the classification of a true villanelle -- but the fact that I could have a thought and bend it into something at least resembling such and old poetic form was accomplishment enough for me.